As I mentioned in my last post, over the last few weeks I have been spending an inordinate amount of time arguing with folks in my head. Actually, I guess any amount of time doing this would be inordinate.

My best guess is that this is a symptom of our divided times. Apparently this stuff is starting to wear on me more than I thought. Most days I like to think my friends who see things differently than me and I are looking at the same rock but from different sides. Occasionally though, and there seem to be more and more of these occasions, it feels like some of us are looking at rocks that don’t exist at all, imaginary rocks that serve only to affirm our fears and biases.

Like I said in the post, it is my hope to somehow redeem this compulsion of inner arguing by using it as a trigger to call myself to prayer. Those people in my head aren’t actually present so speaking to God, who is, would be infinitely more beneficial. It is my hope that pursuing this new habit will improve my chances of passing any pop tests measuring my sanity but I think I may require a bit of heart work and refocusing as well in order to fully recover my balance.

My plan is to spend more time heeding the “higher angels” and not give so much air time to the lower ones like self interests, party, and camp. Higher angels remind us that the call is to love others as though they are a part of us and that is a call that makes winning arguments a poor goal.

The lower angels pull us toward separation and division. They allow labeling that leads to discounting and they herd us toward a loyalty to party and camp that make us defensive. Its a loyalty they don’t deserve. Respect and true listening are out the window when these lower angels are in the driver’s seat.

Full disclosure, I find this stance to be pretty doggone hard, especially when I am being lumped in with “you Democrats,” “you progressives,” and “you Trump haters” and truth is, I am likely to vote with Democrats, stand with progressives, and while I don’t hate him, I can not imagine the circumstances that would cause me to vote for the president. But, somehow I need to find a way to transcend these labels and stay in touch with my heart’s mission to find the best way to love neighbor as myself and remember that my vote is only one part, perhaps a small part, of the total life I desire to live. Labels make us little. Following our heart’s mission makes us human.

Since that previous paragraph has some of you muttering “stupid Democrat” and others screaming, “No! Don’t diminish the importance of this vote!” let me try to get in one sentence before you go. Obedience to the way of love is the call, not camp loyalty. Hopefully the only label we accept for ourselves or use when thinking of others is something along the lines of “Child of God.” (Okay, two sentences)

One of my favorite, and slightly mysterious, scenes in the Bible comes from the book of Joshua, chapter 5. Joshua has a vision in which he comes upon an angel of the Lord and it’s not one of those Valentine cherubs, it’s a bad ass angel. Joshua notices the angel’s sword and as you would expect asks, “Whose side are you on, ours or our adversary’s?”

Hear the angel’s answer, “Neither. I am commander of the army of Yahweh. Remove your sandals for you are on holy ground.” Can you see that even Moses’ successor was called to lift his vision beyond camp and sides? Later, Jesus must have somehow made this stance clear when he called tax collectors, who partnered with with Romans, and zealots, that occasionally assassinated Romans, to come and follow him in the way.

I guess it comes down to what it always seems to come down to. It’s not about me convincing you that I’m right. It’s not about our puny parties and camps. It’s about me following as closely as I can and hopefully that’ll bring a little more justice and mercy into my corner of the world.

Oh, and doing my best to make sure I’m not looking at imaginary rocks.

During the first week of every month I spend some time reading over the previous month’s journal entries.
Hear are some thoughts from September that jumped out at me.

– Read the story of the Prodigal Son this morning. I’ve often heard that when we read this passage it is helpful to ask ourselves which character we identify with. This morning I’m the father, waiting for me to come home.

– Why and how did the song, “Kum Ba Yah” become something silly and not worthwhile? Someone’s praying, someone’s crying, come by here; that’s silly?

-As the election draws near I find that I am spending an inordinate amount time arguing in my head with people who aren’t actually here. I am hoping that when I catch myself doing that in the future I will use it as a trigger to remind myself to pray to the one who is here.

– We went camping with my daughter and her two children. One morning my daughter looked at me and asked, “Why are you smiling?” I answered, “I have a better question, why wouldn’t I be?”

– From Mary Oliver’s, “Just Lying on the Grass at Blackwater,”
“My thoughts simplify, I have not done a thousand things
or a hundred things but, perhaps, a few.”
I add, perhaps a couple more.